Mindful

Mi pueblito

The reward for making it to the top.

Muddy waters

Flow...or cleanse

Today has been one of those days in one of those months in one of those years.

At least I get to head north to greener places soon.

Longing

Frame...

Open

Circle to the left

close to home

arriba...

proximos pasos

This is probably one of my favorite photos ever. I can't put my finger on exactly what attracts me to it. Is it trying to figure out who sat on that chair? Were they waiting, and if so, for what? Or were they content to just sit?

I wanted to post a photo every day last month. So now it's over. I don't know what my next step will be. I do know that this has given me a review of times of my life that have come and gone, but still very much a part of me. They are a reflection of  the way in which I see the world.

But still, I realize the limitations of a photo. There is always a filter of what I choose to see and what gets left out.

But then, isn't that merely a metaphor for life?

Plateau

Spring

levity

a while back, a teller at my credit union told me, "i love your earrings. are they foreign?"

me: "yeah, texas."

teller: blank stare.

me: trying VERY HARD not to laugh at my joke. the level of hilarity increases directly with the lack of response from the other person.

i can't help it. i'm a dork like that.

Update

One of my two readers told me that although she likes the photos I've been posting, I need to write. Ask, and you shall receive, no?

Here's my monthly report in six words: I ran, I coughed, I read.

The El Paso marathon was at the beginning of the month. After being around people the week before with varying levels of illness, I started to not feel well the Friday before the race. I managed to sleep pretty well that evening and made the drive down to ELP. The day of the race, I didn't feel great, but I didn't feel unwell, either. Since the race was paid for, I decided to do it.

I thankfully had my mile nine even before I hit mile two. Nearly the first four miles is straight uphill. There are a few ups and downs but for the most part you're climbing. I noticed that my heart rate started to skyrocket, so I walked about a mile. A slow mile. Aside from being told multiple times before a hill, "It's all downhill from here," the race was fun.

El Paso holds a special place in my heart, the place where all the toxins have congregated. Seriously, the soil under the Asarco plant was black. Black. Look at the mountain off in the distance to see the color in the rest of ELP. The plant's smokestacks are visible.

Okay, this is not the greatest picture, but you get the idea. Nevertheless, I got sick after the race. (I do like El Paso, considering... See the line of cars? Those were people going to the race. We stayed two blocks from the start line. 9 flights of stairs was my warm-up.)

Yes, folks, the never-ending battle with the microbes that won't leave me alone. It was worse than a marathon. My endurance for this crap is wearing thin and my inner adolescent has been unleashed. I'm tired of it disrupting my life and having to forgo things because I don't feel well. I'm finally getting my energy back, though.

I've had more time on my hands to read. Part of the month I didn't have much energy to do much else but read. When I went to Las Vegas last month, I came upon a book entitled The Solace of Fierce Landscapes: Exploring Desert and Mountain Spirituality by Belden C. Lane. It mixes death, life, and stark landscapes. I've had a hard time getting into certain parts, but there was a quote Flannery O'Connor that he referenced: "...sickness is more instructive than a long trip to Europe." There may be some truth to that.

Lane also discussed books by Kathleen Norris. I had heard of her when I read Anne Lamott, who quoted Norris in one of her short stories. Last week I read Acedia and Me and Dakota. Both were good reads, but Dakota really hit home. Although the land that I'm from is not as stark as the western plains, many aspects of the culture she described hit the mark. Right now I'm reading The Cloister Walk. Maybe I'll write a post about all the things that are coming up reading her works.

Next month I'm headed to Colorado for another training for the leadership program. My sister will be joining me for part of the time, and we'll likely be able to catch up with other family members. I have a long weekend starting Friday. My plans for the weekend didn't pan out, but I feel like I need the time to emotionally get over the malaise. Retreat and renewal.

Welcome, Spring.

tempest

Passing

Perspective

Littoral

guard

Desejo

Blooming

Clearing

Today, the clouds lifted and my mood shifted...

refuge

only a few more weeks...

higher

zenith

Projections

you have to hike your own hike

however far you need to go.

I'm on a boat!

Reprive

(i'm not sure why the photos lose resolution when posted. that's the moon near the branches at the top.)

autorretrato

foliage

waiting for spring

perspectivas

vista(s)

Reflejos

reflections of how i feel today.

Recovery

I ran a half marathon this weekend. Since then, what were just hints of getting sick have turned into a full-blown cold. Yuck. At least I have a cool medal to show for all this.

Melancholy

Contemplation

The speed of my life

This picture reveals more about my life than I want to admit. Frenetic pace, at times. Blurry. Too much of it spent in a polluting machine.

Stop

The sign, a reminder of why I was there in the first place.

Lift

Sometimes the seconds on the edge are all that matter.

Muir Beach.

Caminos

The past two days I've been reviewing photos I've taken over the years. I've decided to post some of them here on my blog as a way to help them to come to life. I don't know much about photography; it's all intution. Something propels me to capture a moment, to bear witness. I'm drawn in when a picture reveals a dimension forgotten or missed entirely.

This photo got me thinking. There are strong beliefs in this culture about forging your own path, but this one is hundreds of years old and worn smooth by countless feet. Perhaps it might be wise to know when to take a well-worn trail or when to go out on your own. I think one can even forge his or her own path following the steps of others. You just have to make it your own, whatever it may be.

Neblina obscura

No coming, no going

Katowice, Poland

After the storm

Meditation

The start of "Mindful" by Mary Oliver reminds me to be grateful for the beauty in the world.

Every day
  I see or hear
        something
              that more or less
kills me
    with delight...

It reminds me to look, to listen, and to be.

The thin line

Part of my spiritual practice includes meditation on the breath, observing movements of inhalation and exhalation. Focusing awareness on only that, everything else falls away. Each respiration embraces life and death. The air that sustains us often goes unnoticed unless we stop and be present.

This past week, I learned of the death of a former elementary school classmate. Since I lived in a rural area, the school I attended was very small and everyone knew everyone else, at least on some level. He moved two towns over after graduating from high school and had married someone from there. They had two children.

I didn’t know him well, though, and didn't have any contact with him after I moved away after graduating. But my heart goes out to the family, because in a matter of breaths, they no longer had a husband or a father.

May they eventually find peace in the sorrow.

My mind still can’t make sense of his death or the meaning of it. I don’t think I have ever understood death beyond its most basic conception.

Returning to my breath, I do realize that this moment is a miracle, and I give thanks.

Hola

This year, I want to try to do more writing of any sort. I failed miserably with NANOWRIMO, but to my credit, some uninvited beings set up shop in my lungs and began building their own unsanctioned community. They didn't leave until it was too late. I would have had to write nearly 4k words per day, in addition to getting caught up with everything else in my life after being sick.

So my other goal is to really focus on my health. I'm tired of having how I feel physically affect what I can and can't do, and I don't want all my energy to go to just one part of my life. Running really helps when I can do it. I just need to keep myself at a place where I can.

It wouldn't be a new year without a list, so here's some of what else I'd like to do during the next 12 months:

• Teach a meditation class at a local prision
• Participate in NANOWRIMO
• Take a jewlery making class
• Bake a loaf of bread

It's all out there for the universe to see. I think all my goals from years past still apply, except for running a marathon. Not this year. My motto for this year is shorter and slower.

Adios, 2009!

Happy New Year, everyone! The end of 2009 couldn't have come sooner, but, really, it wasn't a bad year. I learned through challenges, explored through travels and connected with family and friends. The highlights would have to be completing the El Paso Marathon and hiking the Grand Canyon. The rest was mundane, but in a good way.

I'm also happy to enter a new decade. The past ten years have been like a weeklong visit from an old friend with whom I hadn't remained in close contact. I still care about her and enjoy her company, but spending time with her each day is wearing energetically. When she finally leaves, a temporary wave of sadness passes over me and is quickly replaced with relief. I then focus on recharging my inner reserves as I pull inward.

I hope for health, peace and stability for 2010. May I be a calm presence in an often chaotic world. I'll leave you with a quote that has brought me peace in 2009.

          "Do not be impatient with your seemingly slow progress. Do not try to run faster than you presently  
          can. If you are studying, reflecting and trying, you are making progress whether you are aware of it or
          not. A traveler walking the road in the darkness of night is still going forward. Someday, some way, 
          everything will break open, like the natural unfolding of a rosebud."
         Vernon Howard
 
I wish you love, joy and happiness as we enter the new year.

NaNoWriMo, here I come

This was my October marathon: hiking the Grand Canyon. It was absolutely beautiful beyond words but absofuckinlutely* tough. Due to varying circumstances, I didn't have time to train adequately, and now my body is rebelling and giving me more of the same crud I had last year. Meh. But it was worth it.
On Sunday, I start my next adventure. Succumbing to yet another challenge (or maybe pure insanity), I've decided to write a novel next month. It's part of National Novel Writing Month, or NaNoWriMo. All it requires is writing 50,000 words in 30 days! So, yeah. It should be exciting, or something. I think I'll like the disciple of knowing I have to write 1,667 words per day. They don't even have to be quality. To quote NaNoWrimo, "Make no mistake: You will write a lot of crap. And that's a good thing. By forcing yourself to write so intensely, you are giving yourself permission to make mistakes. To forgo the endless tweaking and editing and just create. To build without tearing down." My kind of challenge, and a reminder that writing is not editing. I have a vague outline of the novel, but most of it will be improvised as I go along. I can't wait to see what unfolds.

*Yay for infixes!

Fall

I love this time of year. It's simply my favorite, with the chill to the air. The waining greens yield to the warm browns and oranges. While part of me wants to withdraw and take refuge, a stronger part gets me moving in a way haven't since spring. I realized on my walk yesterday that I tend to hibernate during the summer (veranate?). Once the heat of August has passed, I come out of my cocoon and start to feel my body again.
My arms and legs felt creaky as I moved last night, creaky as my joints and muscles remember. Instead of a cantankerous response, they sent a message of gratitude. Involuntarily my legs started to run. They awakened to their purpose. The brisk air nourishes. I smile and give thanks for movement and change.

Update

Since I've had a request from one of my 2.57 readers to write, here's a new entry. The thoughts never formed themselves into a cohesive post, so we're all stuck with short bulleted blurbs.

• Last month I headed to Colorado for a retreat where Thich Nhat Hanh was to have attended. On the first night, his monastic community read a letter from him stating that he had been hospitalized and unable to travel. My heart sank both because of his physical condition and his absence. Although I had apprehensions about a retreat without him there, it turned out to be a very powerful experience. Things have stuck this time around, and I try to remember advice I received the last evening, "When you breathe, the sangha breathes with you. You, along with everyone here, helped to create this sangha. You don't leave this here."
• August was a time for connecting and reconnecting with others. We had two Servas visits and my friend Melody stayed for a few days. We headed to Vegas, too, to see my friend and to soak.
• I started a leadership program three weeks ago. I've gotten over the fear they made a mistake during the selection process. (When I was a senior in high school, I earned by pure luck the highest score in my school on a state exam in French. My teacher told me initially that I'd be moving to the next level, which was a competition that would involve writing an entire essay in French. Like several pages. I had only composed short paragraphs up to that point. I didn't even want to hear about the presentation that I'd have to make, also in French. I had spent the previous summer trying to find my way around a different, unfamiliar Romance language, and those cognates had been how I did so well on the exam. I didn't have enough fluency to write or speak. There had been a mistake. No way was I going to make a fool of myself. Well, either through a miracle or the manifestation of what I said over and over, my teacher eventually told me that there had been a mistake in the scoring and that I would not be in the state competition afterall.) So, I had the same feeling when I had heard that I'd been selected for this program. A scoring mistake. But I feel more comfortable now, and I think it will be the challenge I need to contiue to grow professionally and personally.
• My sister gave me a ticket to California for my birthday. Five more days. I need it.
• I've made a decision to train for the El Paso Marathon again. I need to.

I've painted my nails...

...because nothing says, hey, I've landed in my mid-thirties, like Rockstar Pink glitter on your fingertips.

à la mode

Throughout my life, I've gone through distinct periods related to fashion. They've ranged from thinking that it was the evil invention of sexist males trying to keep women down to a way to allow for creative expression and discovery. I've recently given up my apathy and begun having a healthy interest again in snagging cool second-hand finds.
As a child, I loved shopping for cheap, unique clothes, especially pieces that I could tell people I found on sale for a dollar, or whatever. Thankfully my style was, shall we say, one-of-a-kind in the rural area where I grew up. What attracted me was often hanging neglected on the clearance rack. It worked out for everyone.
The endearing trait of smugly telling others how little I paid for things was honed at a very young age and continues today. I've had a period of time recently where I haven't cared much about what I wear, probably having to do with the fact that there have been more important foci in my life. Not having much luck at thrift stores or garage sales the past few years, I pretty much gave that up and bought whatever was on sale at certain stores for simplicity.
In the last month, I've discovered the etsy website much to my bank account's dismay. There, one can find cool vintage clothes with a click. No having to sift through dusty piles to find little treasures. However, I did go by a yard sale today at the end of an arduous run. After doing some digging, I managed to find a few things that I wanted to get and had the seller hold them while I went home to get my wallet. By the time I finished the transaction, I had spent $19.
A run-down of my loot:
-a pair of pants
-skirt
-shirt
-2 pairs of shoes
-pair of boots
-blazer
-3 jackets (one leather)
-2 shrugs
-sweater
-plus a skirt and adorable jacket for my friend's daughter
So, yeah. I'm on a thrifter's high. Just be glad you don't live near me and have to hear the rehash over and over. But at least I look good doing so.

Metamorphosis

I had intentions of writing a "real" post with complete sentences and several paragraphs. For some reason, it didn't happen. There's not much of note to write, and that's not really a bad thing.
I'll just say that the next couple of months promise to be full of change on many fronts. Some of this is self-inflicted, and the rest is out of my hands. Thankfully equanimity has been my constant companion.
(Meanwhile I'm enjoying the rockin' tunes on Pandora's Yerba Buena station.)

Qué será, será. Y ya.

Reminders

Tonight, my sister and her partner J are in town on their way to Cali. J has never been to Burque. After hearing about my daily and weekly activities, she said, "You must have a good life here." I hesitated and discovered the only answer was, "Yes, I do." That injection of objectivity reminded me that I have much to be grateful for.

And the rains this week are proof that nothing lasts forever.

one more thing

in a previous post, i lamented the fact the lilacs completely escaped me this year. well, for some reason, i have gotten to see all the flowers i missed this year while visiting other places. lilacs were in full bloom when i traveled to ohio. and, today, in my delirium at the top of the mountain, i found lilies! ¡qué suerte!

Gratitude list, take 2

Time, life has slipped away. So, here I go again:
1. Air at 10,000 ft.

2. My legs

3. My father

4. Pesto season!

5. Fresh eggs

sandias

Hiked the Tramway and La Luz trails today. I think the altitude got to me for the first time. After reaching 9000 ft., I started to get grouchy and a little flaky. I was afraid of tripping at the top and sliding down...for good reasons.
Only one snake sighting.
No dead rodents.
I can't rest...when my eyes are closed, all I see are switchbacks.
My brain must be fried.

Waiting

For once I made it to the airport with plenty of time to relax. There's an application for a leadership program that I need to finish today, and I thought sitting in the airport would be the perfect time to do it. I have to stay put here in this seat for another hour since SWA won't let me check-in my bag until four hours before my flight.
The trip out west was wonderful. I got to do everything I wanted to: eat Ethiopian, see the ocean, drink wine, and explore. It was all good.
I think I'm going to open a flickr account so I can upload the photos. It was fun taking pictures of all the scenery and architecture here.

No halbo nada...

Even among the locura (which is now considered to be my "normal" life), I've noticed a new quirk. After reviewing emails, I've noticed several participles missing the -ed suffix and just odd sentence structure. I'm glad I took the time to proofread.
The other morning, I was having an internal issues convention about a meeting I didn't want to attend. Suddenly, my thoughts we're interrupted: "I'll just tell him I won't be disponsible. I'm busy," I told myself. It made perfect sense.
So let's just say I'm muy lista para mi tripecito. Me voy mañana.

(Y soy tan esmart que invento mi propio idiotoma...)

Overload

So I missed the lilacs this year, all except for a few blooms that I noticed during walking meditation.
An important deadline came and went, and I completely forgot.
My gratitude list is short today. I'm thankful I get a day off tomorrow and a trip this weekend. I need to recharge.
I often wish my brain were more like a cpu. I need a defrag bad.

Grace, 14/365

1. Getting something done at City Hall. It had stressed me for a few days, but now it's done. Now to not worry about food poisioning...
2. Things are coming together for the special event. There seems to be some plan coming to fruition.
3. Cafe con leche
4. A trip to the 415!!! Ca-ching for a cheap, cheap fare to Oakland. Ocean...hot springs...ethiopian food...I need this trip badly, and I'm thankful I can do it.
5. Watching plants grow.

insomnia

It's been going on for almost eight days now.

When my exhausted head hits the pillow, my eyes are wide awake.

Sleep evades. Life continues.

Grace, 13/365

Today was a lovely day. La lista:
1. Spring weather. My favorite kind.

2. Smoked gouda soup

3. Cycle chic

4. Relaxation

5. Jokes from my sister.

Grace 12/365

Okay, so I'm behind a few days. Even with all the abundance in my life, I haven't felt much gratitude lately. Thankfully, a shift occurred today, and the shroud of negativity lifted. To make up for the missed posts, here's an expanded version of the list:
1. Friends. Today was being with three people who are special in their own way. Each has been in my life for varying periods of time, but they all have added a richness that I'm grateful for. Passing time with them, I feel at home.
2. Impermanence. And yet I was reminded while being with these friends of the impermanence of others and of life. I only have this moment.
3. Quincy Jones's Back on the Block album. I was given the March Shambhala Sun in which Alice Walker wrote an article called "Anxiety Soup," which contains three ingredients to ward of the instability of daily life. The first of which is dance. Walker suggests putting on a CD that gets us to move; one of her favorites is Jones's. It got me to dig my out old cassette copy. I'd forgotten about this gem of pure genius. ♥, say my ears and soul.
4. Reminders of attachment. It's not something I particularly like, but it's like a wise old friend urging gently of how much more I need to practice.
5. Lastly, boots. I try to stay away from things related to consumerism here, but I found a sweet pair on sale today. I'd been craving a pair for two years, so I bought them. Ah, I have a long way to go on #4 above!!

Grace, 11/365

1. Getting things done

2. Salad

3. Conversation

4. Cool evenings

5. Meditation

Grace, 10/365

1. Rest

2. Celebration

3. Music

4. Dusk

5. Movement

Sound advice

I received The Lifelong Activist: How to Change the World Without Losing Your Way as a gift late last year. Basically a self-help book for those involved with social change, I was particularly impressed with the section on time management. The author Hillary Rettig has developed documents to assist with tracking one's time and to provide guidance in living a life congruent with one's values.
What really caught my attention, though, was the fact that it's important, well imperative, that there be enough light to complete whatever task is at hand. Literally. There have been several times in the past few weeks when I've tried to find something but am too lazy to get up to turn on the light. It's frustrating....until I shed some light on the subject. Often, it's not that I'm lazy; I just want to conserve, so I don't use any light. But now that I'm paying more attention to my efficiency, I see that even though I may save in some areas, it's not really a benefit.
For most of my life, I have tried to make due in most areas in my life by using as few resources as possible. I've prided myself in being able to accomplish tasks creatively and stretching what I have as far as it will go.
But I've reached a point where it's no longer always most efficient for me to use as little as possible because I've stopped measuring efficiency by how little used or how much money saved. My time, along with my creativity and skills, are also valuable. I need to have the tools to do my job, whatever it is, as well as possible.
So that might mean advocating for what I need. I may have to be more honest with others about what I really can do or provide. And, definitely, I will be making sure there’s enough light.

Grace, 9/365

1. Mondays

2. Sunshine

3. Chickens and their fresh eggs

4. Servas & travelers

5. Clotheslines (and my father for having put it in)

Grace, 8/365

1. Prairie dogs

2. Reading a good book

3. Sleep

4. Laziness

5. Canada geese

Gratitude, 7/365

1. The snow on the mountains

2. A cool, sunny day for running

3. Crisp air

4. Time to relax with a good book

5. Mushroom brie soup

Grace, 6/365

1. The sun peaking through the clouds during the waning moments of daylight.

2. Sushi

3. Generosity

4. Sleep

5. The weekend

Grace, Day 5

Even though things only slightly better, I still have plenty to be grateful for.

1. Reconnecting with old friends.

2. NM Nurse Helpline.

3. Support from others.

4. Garlic.

5. Bright colors that make me happy.

Grace, Day 4

So I'm feeling very short on gratitude today...

1. Locksmiths

2. Sleep

3. (uhhhh.....) Water

4. Air

5. Commitment to making this list.

Le fin....

Grace, day 3

1. Clean sheets dried on the line

2. Health insurance

3. A job I enjoy

4. Strawberry smoothies

5. Recognition

Grace, day 2

1. Being able to go on a long ride because I didn't have to work today.

2. Listening to people's stories while volunteering at a senior clinic.

3. Seeing the clear blue skies after the rain.

4. Smelling the damp earth.

5. Eating sushi.

Balança

When most Fridays roll around, the exhaustion has taken up residence after four days of listening to challenges, trying to find answers, and expressing thoughts in two languages. Balance has been my goal for this year. Some days it's there, and other feel as if it will never be within my reach.

Brooke Williams in his book Half-lifes writes that balance can only be attained while in motion. His analogy of riding a bike seems apt. My take is that it takes practice move closer to that equilibrium. Even though it doesn't necessarily imply doing something, it is not something that can passively be achieved.

I struggle because I know what to do to create more balance in my life, but I often don't act on that knowledge. Instead, I procrastinate or fester my anxiousness until I feel overwhelmed and helpless. Inertia pulls me to do nothing.

At times, I'm able to do things, like writing, that give me a taste of that balance. And it feels pretty good. I just can't understand why it's so difficult to do things that generate balance in my life.

Grace in small things

My friend aml linked to a cool page about grace and gratitude. So, I thought I'd try it, too.
Here's my list for today:

1. Sangha-for strengthening my practice and showing acceptance

2. Bicycle-for feeling the wind upon my face

3. My family-for being

4. Friends-for mirroring

5. Dreary, rainy days-for providing respite and for reminding me not to take the sun for granted

Lunes feliz

Yea!!! for Internet access. My DSL was knocked out for almost two weeks after a windstorm. Earlier last month, it was acting up, too, so I spent most of March without a connection. ¡Qué madness! Now, it's not only back, but improved with wireless! I can use my laptop wherever I'm comfortable: in the backyard, on the couch...maybe it's not such a good thing.
I re-read my last post and realize the tone was not what I intended. What I was trying to uneloquently convey was the question, "How do we talk about making larger changes in the way we consume?" I have a long way to go...I had driven eight hours in a car that burns fossil fuels, after all. And I'm not doing well with following the Compact resolution. I've slipped again. I think 2-3 months is my limit, and then I'm tempted.
Most of my slips haven't been too bad. Yesterday, I got some used and recycled goods, including a free pair of blue snakeskin Doc Martins. It's ironic that as the economy has worsened, I've been able to find more free stuff. I've been able to support my magazine addiction by getting leftovers from the previous month at the Co-op.
Instead of catching up on work, I plan to work on the garden this afternoon. Since there's plenty of compost in the backyard, I didn't need to buy any this year. On the agenda: tomatoes, strawberries, basil, eggplant, zucchini, three types of mint, peppers, onions, lemon grass, cilantro, beans and corn. Add that to the perennials already there, and that's the plan.
One little discovery of sorts. Well, not quite something new, but re-found. I had listed to the Internet radio station Pandora previously, but after my subscription to XM on-line expired, I remembered it. Best of all, it's free.
Tchau.

When I travel, I sometimes am exposed to other forms of media I don't normally pay attention to when I'm at home. A USA Today somehow ended up in my car on the way home, and an article caught my eye when I was reading it later that evening. The article "Frugal Families" highlighted changes that five families have made in slashing their budgets. It also gave suggestions of how others can save money on gas costs and food costs. It discussed ways to increase gas mileage and cutting down purchases of organic food.

I thought the article reflected a common sentiment: we need to make some changes in the manner in which we live our lives, but no major changes. The only factor considered was economic cost, nothing about the other costs associated with buying conventional food or continuing to use fossil fuels.

Surviving this shift will require more than inflating tires to the correct pressure. We need to look at other forms of transportation that relies less on vehicles that use petroleum. When I recently attended the International Water Conservation Conference, I learned that when we try to come up with ways to deal with problems, we need to create solutions that address multiple issues. For example, planting a tree can provide fruit, cool the space around it, create a space for more absorption of water, and decrease the CO2 levels.

This principle needs to apply when we seek for ways to cope with the changing economy. Bicycling and walking are (almost) carbon-free forms of transport and provide health benefits that can decrease medical costs. Planting a garden, however small, can decrease carbon miles, nurture the soil, and create habitat for other species.

So, I want to offer some suggestions to save money and reduce the carbon footprint (some are mine, some I've heard from others):

-Use less stuff. Before you try to make changes, look at what and how you consume.

-Use a clothesline. In the winter, use a clothes rack.

-Join a CSA (Community Supported Agriculture) for fresh food.

-Barter for other goods or services.

-For egg eaters, host a few chickens in your backyard if you have space. Chickens will eat most table scraps and provide plenty of material for enriching your garden.

-Use the library.

-Keep a bucket with you in the shower to collect water. Use the gray water for plants.

-If you have subscriptions to newspapers or magazines, pass them along once you've read them. You can donate them to shelters and prisons.

-Learn how to do things yourself.

This is just a start...this is a creative endeavor. It goes more deeply than just saving money by changing phone plans. We need to change how we live and how we relate to the world around us.

Rockin' the 915

I can cross that one of my list of resolutions. Last Sunday was the El Paso Marathon. I had registered because it was cheap and close. If there had been another race that had met those criteria, I would have chosen that one. Thankfully, there wasn't because it turned out to be an awesome experience.
It started off with our hotel offering to shuttle us to dinner. We ended up at some quasi-swank place that we eventually left after being ignored for more than 10 minutes. It worked out, though, because we ate at a delicious pizzeria nestled in a quaint part of El Paso. I didn't know El Paso had quaint parts. They do.
Afterwards, we had to huddle for more than 40 minutes outside the restaurant we were first at to wait for the shuttle. The weather was cold and windy. It almost felt as if we were in California with the cool, slightly humid breeze.
The next day also began cool. There were almost 2000 runners at the start. I had finally resigned myself to running the marathon. In the weeks leading up to the event, I had doubts that I would be able to do it. Any run more than 16 miles left me feeling like crap and wasn't fun, and I didn't see how I could do 10 more. But, to my benefit, I had dug myself into a little hole. One of my personal goals for my performance evaluation this year is to run a marathon. Since I really didn't want to back out of my goal, I started telling everyone I knew about it. If people know that I'm supposed to be doing something, I do it.
A marathon really involves more mental work than anything else. Granted, one needs to be in some shape to move for many miles and many hours, but self-talk can is what gets you to the finish line. The fans help, too. The volunteers cheered so hard at mile 18 I thought that someone was powerfully overtaking me. They were just cheering! It was exactly what I needed. At mile 25, someone yelled, "Do you want water, Gatorade, or beer?" When I said "beer," they all went crazy. It made me laugh (if only on the inside) that a group of people would be so escatic to pour a cup of beer. Not much further ahead, someone came running in the opposite direction caring a torch and asked if I had beer in my cup. It made him happy that I did. (For some reason this all seemed to make more sense when it happened, and I swear it really was more entertaining...)
Some stops had fruit, chocolate, brats, and gels. There were stops almost every mile. I didn't go hungry or thirsty. That helped me with the self-talk.
I broke down the race into 3 8-mile runs and some change. When LB turned around at mile 8 to finish the half, I was able to tell myself the run had just begun. For most of the race, I only focused on short distances and not the fact that I had to run for a longer time than what I took me to drive to ELP the day before.
I felt fine until mile 21 when I was going down a hill and found I could not walk on gravel. My whole right foot had blistered and was painful. I could only run for a few seconds before having to walk. I had to stay on pavement because it was the least abrasive surface. I was grateful that I had brought along enough Advil to get me through.
I was so happy to turn the final corner to see the finish line. I had made it under the cut-off by just three minutes. But it didn't matter. I did it. It was fun. I enjoyed it. All 26.2 miles.

Me deixa a vontade

When I've thought about writing during the past few weeks, it seems that there's very little to put in here. Now that I'm actually sitting down to do it, there are things I want to say. I'm not sure how to make it all flow. Anyway...

I'll start with my goals because I like structure. I've made progress on all, but nowhere near perfect. I did slip up and buy one thing-lime green eyeshadow-but all-in-all, not a complete f*up as I can do. Everything else is as planned.

In other news, my new license came in the mail last weekend. It was only five days after I took the exam. What a load off my chest!

And...I am taking a cycling class while using cycling crap. (sort of aside: I made a promise to myself many years ago that I would never wear bike sorts. However, I've found that although they look ridiculous, they serve a purpose. I've made a compromise: a skirt over my capris. Only mildly dorky. )

I'm contemplating a ride that crosses my home state the long way, so I'll need to get my ass in gear. Currently, my rides are about two hours long. I have to say that cycling is much more fun than riding. A marathon on a bike is not bad. Once the real running marathon is over, I'll have more time to ride the bike. That will be in two weeks if I make it out unscathed.

Here's a photo from my backyard one morning:

Thus, starting my gratitude list: clotheslines, sun, nature, water, air, and life.

Le fin.

Another resolution

I've bought my first set of wheels. Part of this goes back to the Compact resolution, and another part deals with a trip my sister, LB and I have been discussing. Details to follow.

Another year...

2008 kind of slipped away. While a good part of it was my own doing, some circumstances beyond my control made life interesting, in a challenging way. Needless to say, I didn't make much progress on the goals I set 12 months ago. So, I'm just reusing them again this year. I like to think of it as 2008 v.2.

This time around, though, I thought I would throw in some feel-good goals to help me feel like I'm doing something. Here's my list:

-Eat no red meat
-Recycle
-Exercise
-Speak Spanish
-Read
-Practice mindfulness

What an improvement! I've already done everything on this list and there are still 364 days left to go.

Okay, now on to the rest of the list. The real list.

-Follow the goals of the Compact (this time for the entire year. I made it 3 months last year.)
-Run a marathon. (Training is coming along. Did 4 half-marathons in the last 5 months of 2008.)
-Observe mindful speech. (I've become very mindful of how unmindful my speech is.)
-Save up enough money to take a trip that would involve travel over the equator or across six or more time zones.
-Practice gratitude.

I hope you have a wonderful 2009! Peace.

Amor III

My newest inspiration...(obsession).

http://www.copenhagencyclechic.com/

It makes me want to start riding again.

In case you wanted to know...

It's perfectly legal to hand out beer, with cookies, to your neighbors this holiday season, so says 242-COPS.
+











=is how you show your homies love!

FYI to the maker of the free calendar I just got in the mail:

Death Valley is NOT in New Mexico.

Recession Recipes

I thought, in the spirit of these difficult times, I'd share some recipes I've created to beat the economic doldrums. Well, they're not really recipes; they're dishes I've made up with items I find on my shelves and in the fridge. I still remember my mom admonishing my cousin for using a recipe for apple crisp: "Put that book away. You don't need it!" It's some sage advice that's stuck with me over the years.
So what follows is merely a framework or suggestion. It's nothing set in stone. I also realize that the random food I have in my kitchen is by no means typical. You have liberty to adapt to your taste.

Monday Afternoon Short Sauce
3 cloves garlic, chopped
2 T. sundried tomatoes, in oil
2 tsp. capers
1 T. butter
1 T. olive oil
1/4 c. beer (NM green chile works well)
1/4 cream
pepper and oregano to taste

Heat the oil and butter. When pan is hot, add the chopped garlic. Sauté until golden. Throw in the capers and sundried tomatoes and stir. Add the cream and beer, then pepper and oregano to your liking. Serve over your favorite pasta with freshly grated Parmesan cheese. ¡Buen provecho!

Another mundane post

This week has been more relaxed than many previous. I finally had a weekend that I didn't have something planned nor was I sick for the first time in almost three months. Crazy. I've been slacking although I have stuff to get done. But LB and I did wash the blinds with bleach and clean the windows inside and out. Exciting, no? It's nice to not have to look out through layers of dust. And I managed to clean my room and my car out.
Today was my loooong run day. 12 miles. I had to walk the final 1.5 miles. I just felt as if I were bonking for most of the time.
I was busy most of the day, but I didn't do much else. I ate and tried to soak off some of the soreness from the run. Now I'm ready for bed.

I had a good Thanksgiving. The day started off with a 5k. I pushed it in the rain. Then I volunteered at a community meal. They were supposed to begin serving at 10 AM, but there were people lined up at 8:30 because they had no food in their homes. I'm thankful this year that we have the hope of new leadership...this is a pivotal time that we can use to make real change.
I'm also thankful for my family and friends, for a house and ample food, for the ability to move, for the beauty of mountains and trails. I'm thankful that I have work that challenges me and gives me the opportunity to work toward change.

A pleasant surprise

When I went to check on the chickens and the mighty rooster this morning, I noticed that 37 (aka crazy-broody chicken) wasn't anywhere to be found. They're locked up now, so there's not too many places where they can hide. I checked more closely in their coop. 37 wasn't in there either, but I found 6 eggs! Because of the distinctive white flecks covering the shells, I knew they were hers. She had snuck out while I had gone in the coop, but must have just laid an egg because it was still very warm. This is from a chicken that hadn't produced anything in almost 10 months. The rooster must be magic!

This about sums it up...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c3_95F5e-Ac